Take Back the Night 2008

2,4,6,8
Down with Violence
Down with Hate.

I remember breaking at one point in the march and just started screaming the above chant. I broke my silence. I broke open to the world. Though I did not speak about my experience, I know many strong people who did. And I look up to them for having the courage I did not.

For all of you who don't know, Take Back the Night is an evening dedicated to stopping and or preventing domestic violence and sexual assault. I was the GLBT representative. I gave a short speech I did not write which was fine by me. I was nervous, I slurred some words together but overall it wasn't so bad. A friend of mine read someones story and that story brought me closer to the person. I could feel my stomach churn as she read my other friends experience with abuse.

I cant believe we even have to have that discussion. That we have to come together every year to try to prevent horrific events happening that SHOULD NOT happen to begin with. But I suppose thats life... bad things happen to both good and bad people. Yet every year hundreds of thousands of people are abused or assaulted (GLBT or not).

I hope some day I can walk with my head held high, not afraid of what people think of me, not afraid to walk alone at night, not afraid to be weak. I pray that one day I will be able to let my weaknesses show and that people can see me for who I really am. I am not the hard-ass bitch most people take me for. I am gentle. I am loving. And I am just like everyone else. But most people don't see that side of me. I am terrified to show that. To lower my walls and protection.

When that day comes, I will not fear attack from others, I will only fear the future. Because just like you and everyone else on this planet, there is only one of me. And I should not live in fear for those who cant accept who I am. I send my thanks out to everyone last night who shared their story on domestic abuse or sexual assault. Your courage inspired me.