Hey there,
I know it's hard to feel like I don't care at all.
Where you are and how you feel.
With these lights off as these wheels keep rolling on and on.
(and on and on and on...)
Slow things down or speed them up.
Not enough or way too much.
(and on and on and on...)
How are you when I'm gone?
[Chorus:]
And I can't make it on my own.
(And I can't make it on my own.)
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
(Cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
Spare me just three last words.
"I love you" is all she heard.
I'll wait for you, but I can't wait forever.
[x2][Chorus:]
And I can't make it on my own.
(And I can't make it on my own.)
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
(Cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
(YOU...KILL...ME...WELL)
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
My final breath is gone
So I can fall asleep tonight
[Chorus:]
And I can't make it on my own.
(And I can't make it on my own.)
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
(Cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
(YOU...KILL...ME...WELL)
You know you do, you kill me well
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
[to fade]
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Hawthorne Heights-This Is Who We Are
Between the future and the past tense
Lies the present and the distance
So you think we're never coming back
Scoring points for passion and persistence
Between the lines and the highway
Lies the danger and the safety
You never thought this was gonna last
I always knew you'd never take it back
I always knew (I always knew)
[Chorus: x2]
I know it seems like we're never coming back
I know it feels like we're never coming back
You tried your best and you knew it wouldn't last
They were the words that she placed on her casket
Between the sadness and the smile
Lies the flicker of the fire
You always said this never hurt you
I always said you were a liar
With the all the towers and the wires
There still lies a little silence
Two hearts and one connection
One voice lacks emotion now
I always knew (I always knew)
[Chorus x2]
Instead of flowers like words that never mattered
Close it off forget about the sadness
(close it off forget about the sadness)
He always said she should have tried crying
Blaming him, as she was lying down
Not coming back (Not coming back)
Not coming back (Not coming back)
[Chorus x2]
Lies the present and the distance
So you think we're never coming back
Scoring points for passion and persistence
Between the lines and the highway
Lies the danger and the safety
You never thought this was gonna last
I always knew you'd never take it back
I always knew (I always knew)
[Chorus: x2]
I know it seems like we're never coming back
I know it feels like we're never coming back
You tried your best and you knew it wouldn't last
They were the words that she placed on her casket
Between the sadness and the smile
Lies the flicker of the fire
You always said this never hurt you
I always said you were a liar
With the all the towers and the wires
There still lies a little silence
Two hearts and one connection
One voice lacks emotion now
I always knew (I always knew)
[Chorus x2]
Instead of flowers like words that never mattered
Close it off forget about the sadness
(close it off forget about the sadness)
He always said she should have tried crying
Blaming him, as she was lying down
Not coming back (Not coming back)
Not coming back (Not coming back)
[Chorus x2]
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Drama queens
I know I have known to be a mega drama queen in the past, but im really trying to get over that.
I hate how Drama follows Jen and Ash around... Its like a fucking magnet. I tried to call Jen today to talk to her but she has no minutes because she buys ashleys instead of her own. So I called ash... no answer, which i knew would happen, the her and I got into an arguement over text because she likes arguements... basically calling me a home wrecker... WHEN I TOLD JEN TO STICK IT OUT WITH ASHLEY. Jen told me repeatedly she wanted to leave her... and I said, you are married, stick with it and try more.... you havent even been together a year yet, first and second year I heard are the hardest. Just getting used to someone being there constantly. But Ash was basically accusing me of them being really shitty.. and that I was too close to jen at the club, when ash was all up on me and I backed off. WTF.... Jen and I WERE best friends.. and I told Jen I was not interested in her over 20 times. So when her and I hung out at Kats old apartment with Steve and a few other people, she wrote me this letter... basically AGAIN confessing her undieing love for me. I have this letter and I am really glad I didnt throw it away because I am giving it to Ash to prove to her I havent made the moves and I have never EVER tried to break them up. I basically kept them together at a few points because Jen was ready to take off again (thats what she does when it gets rough).
So ash and i decided to meet up after work so I can give it to her, then 40 min before i get out of work, tells me she is going to the fireworks with Jen (which BTW dont start until 9 and I get out of work at 7 and we were meeting at 730...) So thats not gunna happen. She wanted me to go to the beach and I said no. I cant have the car anyway tonight, but if i did I still wouldnt go. It cant always be on HER terms.
I am just so sick of being accused of shit I havent nor would I ever do. I told her I have a girlfriend who I love very much. Ash said, ya well your not married so that can change... I told her to stuff it, as far as I am concerned, I would be happy to wake up next to Rachel every morning for the rest of my life.
Hows that for a fucking wednesday
I hate how Drama follows Jen and Ash around... Its like a fucking magnet. I tried to call Jen today to talk to her but she has no minutes because she buys ashleys instead of her own. So I called ash... no answer, which i knew would happen, the her and I got into an arguement over text because she likes arguements... basically calling me a home wrecker... WHEN I TOLD JEN TO STICK IT OUT WITH ASHLEY. Jen told me repeatedly she wanted to leave her... and I said, you are married, stick with it and try more.... you havent even been together a year yet, first and second year I heard are the hardest. Just getting used to someone being there constantly. But Ash was basically accusing me of them being really shitty.. and that I was too close to jen at the club, when ash was all up on me and I backed off. WTF.... Jen and I WERE best friends.. and I told Jen I was not interested in her over 20 times. So when her and I hung out at Kats old apartment with Steve and a few other people, she wrote me this letter... basically AGAIN confessing her undieing love for me. I have this letter and I am really glad I didnt throw it away because I am giving it to Ash to prove to her I havent made the moves and I have never EVER tried to break them up. I basically kept them together at a few points because Jen was ready to take off again (thats what she does when it gets rough).
So ash and i decided to meet up after work so I can give it to her, then 40 min before i get out of work, tells me she is going to the fireworks with Jen (which BTW dont start until 9 and I get out of work at 7 and we were meeting at 730...) So thats not gunna happen. She wanted me to go to the beach and I said no. I cant have the car anyway tonight, but if i did I still wouldnt go. It cant always be on HER terms.
I am just so sick of being accused of shit I havent nor would I ever do. I told her I have a girlfriend who I love very much. Ash said, ya well your not married so that can change... I told her to stuff it, as far as I am concerned, I would be happy to wake up next to Rachel every morning for the rest of my life.
Hows that for a fucking wednesday
Sunday, June 15, 2008
20....
So... I am 20....
Happy birthday to me... not.
I cant help but think she should be here to see it... my mom that is. But shes not. So I really hate birthdays... I dont think James will text or call me which makes me mad. We will see. He really doesnt give a damn anymore, which is very sad. I am not sure where I went wrong. I guess he thinks im really conceeded. Which I am not. For once, I found someone who I REALLY liked and I thought he'd be happy for me... instead he just got more distant. He has gotten really mean. I dont know. We drifted... i guess best friend forever was a lie.
Happy birthday Alan. Glad your 21. Come see me soon... which you wont read this so I dont know why i even thought to write it. Whatever.
Happy birthday to me... not.
I cant help but think she should be here to see it... my mom that is. But shes not. So I really hate birthdays... I dont think James will text or call me which makes me mad. We will see. He really doesnt give a damn anymore, which is very sad. I am not sure where I went wrong. I guess he thinks im really conceeded. Which I am not. For once, I found someone who I REALLY liked and I thought he'd be happy for me... instead he just got more distant. He has gotten really mean. I dont know. We drifted... i guess best friend forever was a lie.
Happy birthday Alan. Glad your 21. Come see me soon... which you wont read this so I dont know why i even thought to write it. Whatever.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
New Favorite Song
Sixx A.M.- Life Is Beautiful
You can’t quit until you try
You can’t live until you die
You can’t learn to tell the truth
Until you learn to lie
You can’t breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you’re the joke
There’s nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
I know some things that you don’t
I’ve done things that you won’t
There’s nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home
I was waiting for my hearse
What came next was so much worse
It took a funeral to make me feel alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
You can’t quit until you try
You can’t live until you die
You can’t learn to tell the truth
Until you learn to lie
You can’t breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you’re the joke
There’s nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
I know some things that you don’t
I’ve done things that you won’t
There’s nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home
I was waiting for my hearse
What came next was so much worse
It took a funeral to make me feel alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Its true... i love you. I cant stop thinking about you. Every time you call me.. that ringtone sends chills down my spine. Tomorrow we will be together again.. even if it just for a little while, my dreams come true when you are by my side. Walking together, hand in hand. Its perfection in the making. We can make it. I know we can. We have what it takes to make a team, and a dream. Soon, I will have you back in my arms.
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